Christine in Paris: Part 2

Reminder of the rules....

1. Be Safe

2. You have to Skype or Facetime at least once a day

3. Don't break the camera.

What he forgot to include was...

1. Don't get in a car with strangers at 3am

2. Don't get wasted on Dom Perignon and dance on a table

3. Don't get drunk and sleep on the floor in your brand new party dress...

Day 3.1: Epic Fail....or was it???

Day 3 Agenda:

1. Catacombs

2. Louvre

3. Go out to a Bar

We had the best of intentions, we really did.  After breakfast, we hopped on the train and went South of the Jardin du Luxembourg to the Catacombs to labrynth through skulls and bones, however, when we got there, there was a queue around the block.  I skipped to the front and asked how long they had been waiting and they said 2 hours.  OH HELL NO.  It was already 2PM and the last tour was at 4PM. Could you imagine if we waited in that queue for 2 hours and then couldn't go through?  Not happening. So, we took a picture of our attempt and vowed to come back the following day right when it opened at 10am, pinky swear.

So, that was dumb.  Strike 1.  We hopped back on the train and decided to go to the Louvre.  I convinced Christine to stop into the Centre Pompidou because there were some cool shops there that I wanted to show her (see Dear Future Husband post) and maybe we could get a drink at my favorite little writing spot.

The vibe just wasn't what it had been the 2 previous times so we just grabbed soft drinks while there and played a couple games of Uno.  Christine had a coke that was mediocre at best (not enough carbonation) and I finally tried the Kicoola.  Now, I thought it would kiwi syrup in a Perrier, however, it was kiwi syrup in coke.  BARF.  Plus, I lost in Uno, WTF? Ugh...Strike 2

Next stop was the cute little housewares store that had my amazing wall treatment....no, it didn't.  They fucking took it down, so basically we walked 1.5KM out of our way for nothing.  ARGH!  Strike 3.

Oh, well, right?  We decided to walk to Angelina to get breakfast.  But, I love getting lost in Paris, so I lead her down a street I had never been but was in the direction of where were going anyway.  And that's when we found our hidden gem for the day... Jones+Jones dress shop.  They had the most amazing a line dresses in the window and we decided that after 3 strikes we deserved a fashion show shopping session.  These dresses were super cute and looked fairly expensive, however once we got in there, we found that they were only 80 euros each! ($110)!!  Unheard of!  So, we tried them ALL on.

Fashion Show!!!

Um, hilarious, I look like a tennis player.... are they all this short???

Twinsies..... seriously, are they all this short???

I loved this one.  I chose it because it was kind of ugly on the hanger, but then it ended up looking awesome on.  It was very 1950's except it was short, short, short.  In fact, they were all short, short, short on me.  Like I mean obscenely short, if I bent over, even slightly, all of my goodies were on display....sorry christine....and to think Susan was concerned about you seeing me in my underwear...LOL.

Are we human or are we dancers??

ballerina!

Naughty, see through top, nice bra!

Too bad I don't clean houses, I'd have the perfect outfit.

Winner!  Since Christine is a shorty, these dress were all appropriate length for her and they were not obscene.  So, she bought this one!!!! (The first one she tried on, actually)

Kudos to Jones+Jones for :
1. Making amazing affordable dresses
2. Having amazing artwork in the studio
3. Letting us have a fashion show and take photos!

I actually might have bought one of these if I wasn't homeless and unemployed.

After our amazing shopping trip, we headed to Angelina for a late lunch which was delicious and filling then headed to the Louvre.  On the way there, inside the Louvre Carousel, we found a cute jewelry shop called Agatha, where we bought matching necklaces.  30 minutes later, we were finally going into the museum.  However, it closed at 5:30, not 7:30 so we couldn't get in.  It was a sign from the Gods that we should go home...

Day 3.2: "Who's life am I living right now??"

What started out as a day of epic fails wound up being THE MOST FUN DAY I HAVE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE.  It is a super bold statement and it was formerly held by Gay Pride in Brussels, Belgium (Sorry Jette, Silvia and Fanny), but OMG did we have the best night ever!

We started off in our fancy clothes.  Christine in her new party dress and I in my semi-slutty jersey nightclub dress (my only suitable nightclub dress in my backpack).  We went to a meet-up organized by Aurelie at an Indian-Thai fusion place.  The company was spectacular, the wine was flowing and the food was just so so.  Around 10:30, we headed out to the Opera House for a party outdoors where we were greeted with a huge queue (as always), great music and bottle service paid for by someone else. We were super fortunate to be seated in the VIP area because the rest of the place was so crowded it was inevitable that you would either get spilled on, separated from the group or overrun by people fascinated by the American accent.

Myth about Paris: Parisians don't hate Americans.  They actually like the American accent.  If you try a little French or are at a club or a bar (social setting) and not doing sight seeing, they are super friendly - almost too much so.

Opera House Pre-Party

We met up with some of Aurelie's friends, Jean Baptiste and Claudio, on the steps of the Opera House then proceeded inside where the DJ was spinning a mixture of West Coast rap, classic rock and top 40 pop.

When Snoop came on, Christine, Owen (from Cali, pictured left) and I all let out a collective, "awe shit" or "oh no you didn't" or some other semi-ghetto slang term to which Aurelie responded with an incorrect throw of the West Coast Gang Sign.  The following 5 minutes were met with boastful laughter as Christine and I showed her how to appropriately throw a "West Coast" hand gesture and instruct her that it should also be accompanied by a fish-lipped stank face as well.

wrong wrong wrong....

there you go, gurl...

Oh no they di'n't....

TIme for a photo....Aurelie, get your hair under control...Where's Christine?

A Voila!  There she is!

The night got creepy when too many drinks were served and some folks got out of hand so Mickael, Marc and Stephan rescued us and took us to Bagatelle. When it was first suggested, I got a bit snotty and was like, "Ew, I hate Bagatelle.  Its too far away, the music is bad, there are too many people and it reminds me of a douchy LA club with worse music and shitty people." Mickael insisted the music was better on Saturdays and that we would have fun, so we conceded....and thank God we did...

Stephan was driving.  He rolled up in a BMW convertible and we all hopped in...he was fine to drive from a sober perspective, however, he is the craziest driver on the planet.  He was whipping in and out of traffic on the Champs Elysees at 60mph and cornered the Arc de Triomphe like he was on rails! This had the potential of violating rule #1 (Be Safe).  In fact, Christine freaked out a little bit claiming that she was sure she was breaking rule #1, but I insisted that she was technically totally safe until something bad happened, so she was in the clear.  

I was sitting behind Stephan and put on my seatbelt, poor Christine got stuck in the middle between Marc and I, on a hard center console, not even a seat, so there was no lap belt.  Since I am an amazing friend, I totally put my arm across her like a seatbelt while we were ducking and weaving in traffic....LOL.  

For the record, I still stand by the fact that there were no official rules violated.  We just added excitement to the adventure with a little reckless abandonment....

This is how fast we raced around the Arc de Triomphe (source: http://arc-de-triomphe.monuments-nationaux.fr/)

When we arrived, there was a long queue, but we didn't wait in it.  And that's when it happened.  The stars aligned and the music Gods met with the good-fortune Gods and a beautiful evening was born. They were playing 90's rap all night long! We had table service away from the riff-raff and started the second half of our night with 2 bottles of Dom Perignon, Montel Jordan, and the best company ever. Christine, Mickael, Marc, Stephan and I danced the night away until 4:30 in the morning.  At some point another bottle of Dom and a bottle of Belvedere vodka came out and the rest of the night was a blur.

Here's what we remember...

1. Each bottle came out with a sparkler and Christine waved it like she was leading a marching band

2. CHRISTINE WALTHER CAN RAP, and did so to EVERY song played that night.

3. Stephan is a dancing fool.  His hat was traded around over and over for hours of amazing photo opportunities.

4. Mickael, Marc and Stephan are amazing company.  They are the perfect mix of protective and fun. They keep away the creepers but dance, dance, dance and they don't try to freak up on you.  They are super aware and had waters in our hands when they saw the Dom getting the better of us.

5. The night ended with Whitney Houston (and every other douchebag in the club) singing I Will Always Love You - seriously, they played almost the whole song until it burst into a techno beat 3 minutes in....

6. Christine, who was dancing on the table looked down on me and yelled, "Who's life am I living right now?!"  To which I replied, "Mine.  Welcome!!!"

Dom Perignon? Oui!

Dancing on the table?

Christine Rapping... Marc looks unimpressed...although I was.

More Dom, More Dom!

This happened.

Over-served.

wasted. happy. goodnight.

If only the morning had felt as good as the night before.  Someone passed out on the floor of my apartment in their new party dress....I'm not telling who.  But, lets just say the 9:30 alarm that was set for the Catacombs was a rude awakening for all.

Part 3: The aftermath to come....